In the tradition of a Vulcan mind meld, I received the following story which was channeled to me by a toad. Normally, I would just ignore such things and move on, but occasionally, the lesser creatures have something to offer that can be applied to the structure of our own society. I humbly submit this message from Fenton, the toad.

My name is Fenton, and I was a toad. I was born in the rain ditch and moved to dry land to seek my fortune. Like most of the other toads, I spent a lot of time near the water after I crawled up to the land, but one night, the rain came really hard, so I climbed the mountain by the ditch to keep from being swept away by the raging water. That's when I discovered toad heaven...at least that's what I called it. The place was very different from the land where I was born. The ground was hard like a rock, but much smoother than the rocks I had seen by the ditch. At the top of the mountain, the new rock was everywhere, and it was a good place to hang out and sun myself during the day.

It was during the night time that I found out how different this new place really was. At the top of the mountain, there was a smaller sun that kept the rocks lit up all through the night. It could be dark in the ditch valley, but I was able to see the sun all the time. Not only that, but when the night sun came on, I could fill my belly with as many bugs as I could eat. Thousands of them flew right into the little sun, and fell right on my plate. It was sweet I tell you. Every day, as the big sun went down, water came squirting right out of the ground, and I could drink as much as I wanted.

After I spent a week in this place, I started wondering why all the toads did not get up here from the ditch and live the good life with me. At night, I hollered down the mountain and told the others they did not know what they were missing, but nobody else would come up. After a while I just decided that if others did not want to come, I could be happy, and it just meant that there was all the more for me to enjoy by myself. I got pretty fat on those bugs.

On the last day I spent at the top of the mountain, I was looking up at the night sun when the wall suddenly swung open, and the biggest thing I have ever seen came out from the wall. I tried to get out of its way, but the thing could walk farther than I could go in ten jumps, and its foot came smashing down, covering my whole body. I did not have a chance to escape. I was too fat and slow, and it was just too big. I felt the foot of the thing smashing down on me, crushing every piece I had in me. I heard it say, "Oh crap, Honey, I stepped on a toad. Ewww."

As my life drained out, I could not help wondering if living for a little while at the top of the mountain by myself was better than a longer life in the ditch, surrounded by friends. Being dead made me wish I had stayed in the valley. Too late now.